Our 2 angels. xx

Our 2 angels. xx
Rinty and Spring. xx

Odd One Out. A poem written by Sarah Edwards.

Why oh why are we odd ones out,
Night after night, I dream of more,
Time and time again, I say to myself,
The longing,wanting,hurting, feels so sore,
Will it be different for us,
No, I don’t seem to think,
Friends,family don’t understand,
Our feelings, our yearnings, our hopes and dreams.
Oh, there she is, the barren one,
Nothing can fill this empty space,
In my hearts desire, this tragic place,
In enters the stress, failure and desperation.
Just the same, month in, month out,
Soon the years begin to race by,
Why us, why me, why not one day,
Whatever did we do wrong to live this way.
Children laughing, playing, having fun,
Sounds of happiness and joy,
But here, there is just frozen silence,
For ever, feeling the pain inside,
People think in family ways, planning this and that,
Days out at the zoo, picnics and the seaside,
Bucket and spades, sand in your shoes,
We would love this, if only God would choose.
Empty homes, empty rooms, empty wombs,
Just us two, as one, as ever before,
Don’t get me wrong, the strong love is there,
Will always be, I will love you ever more,
Friends, colleagues,neighbours, forget you have none,
Just everyday planning of family fun,
This is all so easy and normal for you,
Then why oh why, cant we share it too…

Tuesday 17 September 2013

Fresh start

Well 17 months after my total hysterectomy I feel much better, but feel empty....Not in so much pain thankfuly only from the pain from a few adhesions. My heart will always ache from never being able to carry a child.

On 5th August 2013 I started a brand new job with Marks & Spencers at there great big brand new warehouse just down from the road where I live. Im loving it up to now......

My life should be good now, we are both working fulltime, have 2 lovely dogs, but...there is always a but isn't there....

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